allstars | pc catchall | kaworu

[halians]

somewhere taair is feeling very stressed and he has no idea why

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[halians]

...I get it. I do.

[ he wanted to catch vi's killer just as bad. wanted to make them pay. but it feels painful to think about in the context of knowing what most likely is a truth.

... ]

It wouldn't have made it hurt any less.

[peripheries]

Are you sure? It feels like it could have. At least there would have been something to old on to.

[halians]

Yeah.

..Come on, let's go sit down. [ he says, moving to get kaworu's arm over his shoulder. he'll just pick him up if he's too gangly to move at the moment. ] Happened to me before.

Someone who was complicit in the worst moment of my life - who harmed me and mine beyond all - died in a gruesome, horrific way. He was the worst of the worst: prejudiced, arrogant, brutal, and most of all, didn't give a damn about anyone or anything that was crushed on his way to becoming a figure of power. There was a time I wanted to kill him. I beat the hell out of him, even, but he got away from me. I felt like it wasn't enough. Wanted him dead, for all that he did.

... A few weeks later, we ran into each other again - both captives of the same person. And I watched, as he was eaten by a human. A monster. Every gory, gruesome moment. It was a horrifying, agonising, painful death. It was exactly what I wished upon him from the moment that I learned he was complicit.

[ he's not looking at kaworu as he tells this story - gaze focused ahead on their destination, the closest couch. ]

Didn't fix anything, though. It didn't bring my people, or my village, back. It didn't make me feel any better. All I felt when it was over was numb.