strohl's standing in the market watching the little robots just... clean up... the last little bits of the exploded dead people.... with his hands on his hips and a deep frown on his face. this does not get any better when he notices glodell - in fact, he tenses a little further, looking sour. ]
[ well. glodell is also a little on edge after that. (and so is hector, but that might be mostly because he's disappointed to see the gore getting cleaned up when he hasn't had a chance to lick it.) ]
What do you mean, what? This isn't your personal space.
A man just exploded, here, Glodell, hell. I hope it's not my personal space.
[ do you ever not realize how often you say "god" as an expression of ughhh until you're playing someone who probably doesn't say it.
still it's hard not to be tense, and he stiffly shrugs a shoulder in what you could sort of consider a sort of deference, or at least an acquisition to being snippy. ] Sorry. [ sort of. ] Did you see what happened?
At least the consequences of that one weren't so dire. [ except to your stomach and pride lmao ] ...But I agree that it's not a particularly encouraging trend.
[ he's not unconvinced something horrible happened and this is some fucked up dream but that seems like overthinking and not a wise thing to say out loud so he does not
[ btw your WE GET IT THE VILLAGE BURNED DOWN made me laugh so fucking bad i didnt get to say during trial but it made me feel very ic
anyway
wow!! its a while after trial now. strohl's outside somewhere, arms folded, yellow jacket shed somewhere, kind of staring off into the distance. it's not great chief but he looks like less like he's ready to bite someone's head off than he did an hour ago so there's that! ]
[ i'm glad lmao. and he's glad the yellow jacket is gone for the moment because yellow just reminds him of cheese and he never wants to think about cheese again.
anyway he's just out here taking hector for a walk i guess. he pauses when he sees strohl and strongly considers just walking the other fucking way, especially after his near-meltdown at the end of trial. but then hector gets extremely interested in a patch of grass he starts sniffing during this pause, so now he's just stuck here.
...
sighs. ]
Do you think it was worth it, finding the answer today?
you know. it's a good question. he looks at glodell for a moment, out of the corner of his eye, and then looks back out at the view (or lack thereof, really), considering his answer. and, eventually... ]
... I'd rather know than sit in the dark. [ after all, it was knowing that set him on his path, that found his lodestar and awakened him to his archetype. ] Can't let people like that just get away with it. It happens enough at home.
[ vi and fushiguro deserved better than that. apollo did, too. ]
[ sighs deeply i fell asleep writing a reply to this on my phone last night and i guess i closed the tab
anyway
he cannot say whether fushiguro deserved better than that because he still doesn't know who the fuck he is even after carrying a bunch of pieces of his body around in cheese form today. but he will concede that the others probably didn't deserve this shit. ]
'People like that'? You mean ones who delude themselves into thinking what they're doing is for the greater good when it's also conveniently for their own benefit, or what?
[ people like your fucking boss, he does not say, which takes an unbelievable amount of self control ]
... One way to put it, I suppose. [ his foot taps where he's standing. tap tap. ] More like - those who delude themselves that the lives of the people who are sacrificed for their cause don't matter.
honestly, it's the trauma talking. they say you could see Halia burning as far as the palace battlements, he'd said. pleased with himself, with his little plan. far, far too recent of a wound for this to go over anything but sourly. ]
You think you'd still feel that way if she picked you? [ sharply. ] Decided you needed to be the unlucky one whose number came up. Decided you deserved to be tossed aside for the better good.
Obviously I'd have been bloody furious if that were the case, but that's not the point? Unless she's both an actress and a compulsive liar on top of being a complete loon, she clearly didn't feel just fine about having done it. Not to mention she supposedly carried out that damned... cheese plan in an attempt to spare her victim the pain. Bafflingly stupid on every level, but not the actions of someone who thought nothing of the people she was sacrificing, no matter how deluded.
Don't go putting words in my mouth. [ because like yeah i mean he would have liked it substantially more than the people who did die but he's not going to say that out loud. anyway!!! scowling a little again, he shoves his hands in his pockets. it's not as heated as it was before, but - ]
If she'd thought about it, she might not have attacked them in the first place. Might've been smart to, I don't know, tell someone, instead of thinking that she could handle it by herself, because anyone with sense between their ears could've told her how insane that idea was.
[ there's a beat, as he lapses off of that deeply trauma related tirade, and takes a deep breath in through his nose, and out through his mouth. it's worse to agree because he does know he's right, to a point (and agreeing with him is vaguely akin to fighting a room full of goborns: downright unpleasant, especially out loud) but the brief silence and the attempt to not be angry is a sign of it all the same. ]
... The actual enemy here's whatever brought us here in the first place. Clearly, that's connected to whatever made her lose sight of common sense. [ and that's a target he can be furious with. ]
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week 1 monday
strohl's standing in the market watching the little robots just... clean up... the last little bits of the exploded dead people.... with his hands on his hips and a deep frown on his face. this does not get any better when he notices glodell - in fact, he tenses a little further, looking sour. ]
What?
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What do you mean, what? This isn't your personal space.
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[ do you ever not realize how often you say "god" as an expression of ughhh until you're playing someone who probably doesn't say it.
still it's hard not to be tense, and he stiffly shrugs a shoulder in what you could sort of consider a sort of deference, or at least an acquisition to being snippy. ] Sorry. [ sort of. ] Did you see what happened?
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he's bristling and getting ready to snap back at first, but sighs and begrudgingly lets it go after the sort-of apology. ]
...Just the end of it. Some sort of fireworks accident, I suppose.
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Right. [ ...
his foot starts tapping. tap tap tap. ] Two freak accidents in a row.
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[ a grunt of an answer, but yeah ] Not exactly a welcoming package.
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anyway ]
Out of the frying pan, into the damn fire.
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If that's really the case it'll be just my luck.
[ though it is much more tolerable when other people — especially these other people — are sharing in the misfortune with him. ]
week 1, sat
anyway
wow!! its a while after trial now. strohl's outside somewhere, arms folded, yellow jacket shed somewhere, kind of staring off into the distance. it's not great chief but he looks like less like he's ready to bite someone's head off than he did an hour ago so there's that! ]
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anyway he's just out here taking hector for a walk i guess. he pauses when he sees strohl and strongly considers just walking the other fucking way, especially after his near-meltdown at the end of trial. but then hector gets extremely interested in a patch of grass he starts sniffing during this pause, so now he's just stuck here.
...
sighs. ]
Do you think it was worth it, finding the answer today?
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you know. it's a good question. he looks at glodell for a moment, out of the corner of his eye, and then looks back out at the view (or lack thereof, really), considering his answer. and, eventually... ]
... I'd rather know than sit in the dark. [ after all, it was knowing that set him on his path, that found his lodestar and awakened him to his archetype. ] Can't let people like that just get away with it. It happens enough at home.
[ vi and fushiguro deserved better than that. apollo did, too. ]
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anyway
he cannot say whether fushiguro deserved better than that because he still doesn't know who the fuck he is even after carrying a bunch of pieces of his body around in cheese form today. but he will concede that the others probably didn't deserve this shit. ]
'People like that'? You mean ones who delude themselves into thinking what they're doing is for the greater good when it's also conveniently for their own benefit, or what?
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... One way to put it, I suppose. [ his foot taps where he's standing. tap tap. ] More like - those who delude themselves that the lives of the people who are sacrificed for their cause don't matter.
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anyway he's a little ?? at that because that is... not how she came off to him. self-serving, sure, but not like, a psychopath about it. ]
...I've no interest in defending her, but that sounds to me like you're putting words in her mouth.
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honestly, it's the trauma talking. they say you could see Halia burning as far as the palace battlements, he'd said. pleased with himself, with his little plan. far, far too recent of a wound for this to go over anything but sourly. ]
You think you'd still feel that way if she picked you? [ sharply. ] Decided you needed to be the unlucky one whose number came up. Decided you deserved to be tossed aside for the better good.
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[ as hector lifts his leg in the background. ]
Obviously I'd have been bloody furious if that were the case, but that's not the point? Unless she's both an actress and a compulsive liar on top of being a complete loon, she clearly didn't feel just fine about having done it. Not to mention she supposedly carried out that damned... cheese plan in an attempt to spare her victim the pain. Bafflingly stupid on every level, but not the actions of someone who thought nothing of the people she was sacrificing, no matter how deluded.
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Don't go putting words in my mouth. [ because like yeah i mean he would have liked it substantially more than the people who did die but he's not going to say that out loud. anyway!!! scowling a little again, he shoves his hands in his pockets. it's not as heated as it was before, but - ]
If she'd thought about it, she might not have attacked them in the first place. Might've been smart to, I don't know, tell someone, instead of thinking that she could handle it by herself, because anyone with sense between their ears could've told her how insane that idea was.
[ there's a beat, as he lapses off of that deeply trauma related tirade, and takes a deep breath in through his nose, and out through his mouth. it's worse to agree because he does know he's right, to a point (and agreeing with him is vaguely akin to fighting a room full of goborns: downright unpleasant, especially out loud) but the brief silence and the attempt to not be angry is a sign of it all the same. ]
... The actual enemy here's whatever brought us here in the first place. Clearly, that's connected to whatever made her lose sight of common sense. [ and that's a target he can be furious with. ]