you know. it's a good question. he looks at glodell for a moment, out of the corner of his eye, and then looks back out at the view (or lack thereof, really), considering his answer. and, eventually... ]
... I'd rather know than sit in the dark. [ after all, it was knowing that set him on his path, that found his lodestar and awakened him to his archetype. ] Can't let people like that just get away with it. It happens enough at home.
[ vi and fushiguro deserved better than that. apollo did, too. ]
[ sighs deeply i fell asleep writing a reply to this on my phone last night and i guess i closed the tab
anyway
he cannot say whether fushiguro deserved better than that because he still doesn't know who the fuck he is even after carrying a bunch of pieces of his body around in cheese form today. but he will concede that the others probably didn't deserve this shit. ]
'People like that'? You mean ones who delude themselves into thinking what they're doing is for the greater good when it's also conveniently for their own benefit, or what?
[ people like your fucking boss, he does not say, which takes an unbelievable amount of self control ]
... One way to put it, I suppose. [ his foot taps where he's standing. tap tap. ] More like - those who delude themselves that the lives of the people who are sacrificed for their cause don't matter.
honestly, it's the trauma talking. they say you could see Halia burning as far as the palace battlements, he'd said. pleased with himself, with his little plan. far, far too recent of a wound for this to go over anything but sourly. ]
You think you'd still feel that way if she picked you? [ sharply. ] Decided you needed to be the unlucky one whose number came up. Decided you deserved to be tossed aside for the better good.
Obviously I'd have been bloody furious if that were the case, but that's not the point? Unless she's both an actress and a compulsive liar on top of being a complete loon, she clearly didn't feel just fine about having done it. Not to mention she supposedly carried out that damned... cheese plan in an attempt to spare her victim the pain. Bafflingly stupid on every level, but not the actions of someone who thought nothing of the people she was sacrificing, no matter how deluded.
Don't go putting words in my mouth. [ because like yeah i mean he would have liked it substantially more than the people who did die but he's not going to say that out loud. anyway!!! scowling a little again, he shoves his hands in his pockets. it's not as heated as it was before, but - ]
If she'd thought about it, she might not have attacked them in the first place. Might've been smart to, I don't know, tell someone, instead of thinking that she could handle it by herself, because anyone with sense between their ears could've told her how insane that idea was.
[ there's a beat, as he lapses off of that deeply trauma related tirade, and takes a deep breath in through his nose, and out through his mouth. it's worse to agree because he does know he's right, to a point (and agreeing with him is vaguely akin to fighting a room full of goborns: downright unpleasant, especially out loud) but the brief silence and the attempt to not be angry is a sign of it all the same. ]
... The actual enemy here's whatever brought us here in the first place. Clearly, that's connected to whatever made her lose sight of common sense. [ and that's a target he can be furious with. ]
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you know. it's a good question. he looks at glodell for a moment, out of the corner of his eye, and then looks back out at the view (or lack thereof, really), considering his answer. and, eventually... ]
... I'd rather know than sit in the dark. [ after all, it was knowing that set him on his path, that found his lodestar and awakened him to his archetype. ] Can't let people like that just get away with it. It happens enough at home.
[ vi and fushiguro deserved better than that. apollo did, too. ]
no subject
anyway
he cannot say whether fushiguro deserved better than that because he still doesn't know who the fuck he is even after carrying a bunch of pieces of his body around in cheese form today. but he will concede that the others probably didn't deserve this shit. ]
'People like that'? You mean ones who delude themselves into thinking what they're doing is for the greater good when it's also conveniently for their own benefit, or what?
no subject
... One way to put it, I suppose. [ his foot taps where he's standing. tap tap. ] More like - those who delude themselves that the lives of the people who are sacrificed for their cause don't matter.
no subject
anyway he's a little ?? at that because that is... not how she came off to him. self-serving, sure, but not like, a psychopath about it. ]
...I've no interest in defending her, but that sounds to me like you're putting words in her mouth.
no subject
honestly, it's the trauma talking. they say you could see Halia burning as far as the palace battlements, he'd said. pleased with himself, with his little plan. far, far too recent of a wound for this to go over anything but sourly. ]
You think you'd still feel that way if she picked you? [ sharply. ] Decided you needed to be the unlucky one whose number came up. Decided you deserved to be tossed aside for the better good.
no subject
[ as hector lifts his leg in the background. ]
Obviously I'd have been bloody furious if that were the case, but that's not the point? Unless she's both an actress and a compulsive liar on top of being a complete loon, she clearly didn't feel just fine about having done it. Not to mention she supposedly carried out that damned... cheese plan in an attempt to spare her victim the pain. Bafflingly stupid on every level, but not the actions of someone who thought nothing of the people she was sacrificing, no matter how deluded.
no subject
Don't go putting words in my mouth. [ because like yeah i mean he would have liked it substantially more than the people who did die but he's not going to say that out loud. anyway!!! scowling a little again, he shoves his hands in his pockets. it's not as heated as it was before, but - ]
If she'd thought about it, she might not have attacked them in the first place. Might've been smart to, I don't know, tell someone, instead of thinking that she could handle it by herself, because anyone with sense between their ears could've told her how insane that idea was.
[ there's a beat, as he lapses off of that deeply trauma related tirade, and takes a deep breath in through his nose, and out through his mouth. it's worse to agree because he does know he's right, to a point (and agreeing with him is vaguely akin to fighting a room full of goborns: downright unpleasant, especially out loud) but the brief silence and the attempt to not be angry is a sign of it all the same. ]
... The actual enemy here's whatever brought us here in the first place. Clearly, that's connected to whatever made her lose sight of common sense. [ and that's a target he can be furious with. ]