[ TOO LATE he's already halfway across the fucking room and immediately kneels down to try and like, get a look at his face and make sure he's okay? like a fussy mother hen. looking him over for injuries, too.
please ignore the fact he looks like he's going to pass out because he moved too fast it's fine. he has all his limbs he's fine. ]
[ strohl......................... are you an idiot
haru does not say this, he's just surprised, then a little concerned. he is injured, predictably, but considering strohl is probably worse off this is SILLY. ]
...I'll be okay. The defibrillator is working. [ he coughs a little, which really makes this feel like a first aid area ] At least sit.
[ there's a long answer to this question about cyoa thursdays and trauma and how much it matters to protect his People TM but the short answer is just yea he's a moron
anyway. he will finally acquiesce to this - just kind of plopping down where he is on the floor, wisely resting his other hand on the bed edge so he doesn't actually fall over. listen he's fine. ]
Good. [ nyeh!!! there's genuine relief in that, the worry and concern not fading even a bit. ] I was hoping you'd not be... bloody bad luck. [ our poor normie... ] What happened...?
[ what's the state of the haru now that he's not a sweaty idol ]
[ protective... but also dummy. he really does not seem fine. haru looks on with some concern of his own at how he carries himself. ]
I've been on a few of these now, so... [ it's bad luck, but at least it doesn't come as a massive shock to him anymore. it's more par for the course than anything. ] It was—
[ it's memshare week so i will abuse it to summarize: there is a quick march of memories, ones of being very young and less young, living life on a strange and often hostile planet. and then time repeats itself: he survives a close encounter to only to die to illness, then loops through it again. jonas and sqq are there, growing up also, dying and living, until they end up on the same time loop together.
strohl can catch a glimpse of himself too!! he is there during some conflict with the planet's native wildlife, and also when the children need to grab someone to shoot at monsters. ]
[ DEFENDING THE CHILDREN..... 🥹 is this how you see him..... warm.....
anyway thank god for memshare. strohl watches this with a deep frown on his face, whatever remark he's about to make silenced as it passes on. dying and living, dying and living; he hears alex say cycles in the back of his mind but ignores it, until it fades away.
he looks troubled as it's finished, then slowly exhales out after, shaking his head. ]
... It doesn't matter that you've done it more than once - you ought not to have had to at all. [ was his prior thought from before - important to say, still, important to point out how shitty it is to be stuck in a circumstance where you're required to get your ass kicked on thursday multiple times no matter who you are - but he gives up after that and leans against the side of the bed, thinking all of that over with a little frown on his face. ]
How many of those... loops did you end up living through? Did you remember them all...?
[ it's not like he has good opinions of his team or anything tch
anyway, haru isn't exactly numb to all of this—he is an eighteen year old swim team—but it's easy to start distancing himself from it all. strohl is very different, heated and sympathetic, and he does appreciate that, his expression soft even if it remains pretty staid. ]
Three for me, though the others had their own. There was some overlap... It got confusing, and I remember it all, but—...it's not all there, like I lived it.
[ he doesn't feel dozens of years older, but he also remembers it. it's a strange mix of the two. he coughs into the crook of his arm and continues. ]
...I'm getting better. Tell me what happened to you now.
mmgh. well. he's got more questions, but - strohl won't let haru relive it over and over (haha) if he doesn't want to, so. he shifts a little how he's half collapsed on the ground like an idiot and then pulls something out of his pocket. it's... a little doll!
and he sets it on the bed for haru to look at. ]
It was hers. [ vi's, that is. piltover. because of course it was, because he hasn't relived the loss of his best friend a thousand times over by this point enough. ] I'd know it in a second. Don't know how it related, but I had her gauntlets when I - the third time I woke up.
[ NOOOooo the little doll... it is immediately obvious who it relates to, even without strohl spelling out a name. all it takes is a glance. he looks sympathetic, realizing how close the two are, and knowing these stories never go anywhere good. ]
The third time...?
[ what the hell happened here. not more loops at least. ]
Was Vi... there? [ he likes her very much too so ]
For a moment or two at the beginning. But....at least part of it, I think, was based on her. Reminded me of a story she told me about her home when I got back, now that I've got my head on straight.
The first part, though... [ shaking his head. ] That, I've no idea. Thought I was back home, but it was some - alternate universe. Had all the things I'd want. My home restored, Louis dead, the kingdom at relative peace... even someone I lost alive. But - Will wasn't.
[ his nose wrinkles a little as he tells this, affronted. ] That's what it was trying to tell me. If I felt like Will's death was worth all of that. It wasn't.
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haru is also in first aid though, yeah. he gives him a pointedly alarmed look, shoulders hopping a little because he was definitely just zoning out. ]
...Strohl.
[ ... ]
Take it easy. [ HE IS LITERALLY GOING TO HURT HIMSELF LIKE THIS ]
no subject
please ignore the fact he looks like he's going to pass out because he moved too fast it's fine. he has all his limbs he's fine. ]
You got taken too - damn it, are you alright?
no subject
haru does not say this, he's just surprised, then a little concerned. he is injured, predictably, but considering strohl is probably worse off this is SILLY. ]
...I'll be okay. The defibrillator is working. [ he coughs a little, which really makes this feel like a first aid area ] At least sit.
no subject
anyway. he will finally acquiesce to this - just kind of plopping down where he is on the floor, wisely resting his other hand on the bed edge so he doesn't actually fall over. listen he's fine. ]
Good. [ nyeh!!! there's genuine relief in that, the worry and concern not fading even a bit. ] I was hoping you'd not be... bloody bad luck. [ our poor normie... ] What happened...?
[ what's the state of the haru now that he's not a sweaty idol ]
no subject
I've been on a few of these now, so... [ it's bad luck, but at least it doesn't come as a massive shock to him anymore. it's more par for the course than anything. ] It was—
[ it's memshare week so i will abuse it to summarize: there is a quick march of memories, ones of being very young and less young, living life on a strange and often hostile planet. and then time repeats itself: he survives a close encounter to only to die to illness, then loops through it again. jonas and sqq are there, growing up also, dying and living, until they end up on the same time loop together.
strohl can catch a glimpse of himself too!! he is there during some conflict with the planet's native wildlife, and also when the children need to grab someone to shoot at monsters. ]
no subject
anyway thank god for memshare. strohl watches this with a deep frown on his face, whatever remark he's about to make silenced as it passes on. dying and living, dying and living; he hears alex say cycles in the back of his mind but ignores it, until it fades away.
he looks troubled as it's finished, then slowly exhales out after, shaking his head. ]
... It doesn't matter that you've done it more than once - you ought not to have had to at all. [ was his prior thought from before - important to say, still, important to point out how shitty it is to be stuck in a circumstance where you're required to get your ass kicked on thursday multiple times no matter who you are - but he gives up after that and leans against the side of the bed, thinking all of that over with a little frown on his face. ]
How many of those... loops did you end up living through? Did you remember them all...?
no subject
anyway, haru isn't exactly numb to all of this—he is an eighteen year old swim team—but it's easy to start distancing himself from it all. strohl is very different, heated and sympathetic, and he does appreciate that, his expression soft even if it remains pretty staid. ]
Three for me, though the others had their own. There was some overlap... It got confusing, and I remember it all, but—...it's not all there, like I lived it.
[ he doesn't feel dozens of years older, but he also remembers it. it's a strange mix of the two. he coughs into the crook of his arm and continues. ]
...I'm getting better. Tell me what happened to you now.
[ fair's fair ]
no subject
mmgh. well. he's got more questions, but - strohl won't let haru relive it over and over (haha) if he doesn't want to, so. he shifts a little how he's half collapsed on the ground like an idiot and then pulls something out of his pocket. it's... a little doll!
and he sets it on the bed for haru to look at. ]
It was hers. [ vi's, that is. piltover. because of course it was, because he hasn't relived the loss of his best friend a thousand times over by this point enough. ] I'd know it in a second. Don't know how it related, but I had her gauntlets when I - the third time I woke up.
no subject
The third time...?
[ what the hell happened here. not more loops at least. ]
Was Vi... there? [ he likes her very much too so ]
no subject
For a moment or two at the beginning. But....at least part of it, I think, was based on her. Reminded me of a story she told me about her home when I got back, now that I've got my head on straight.
The first part, though... [ shaking his head. ] That, I've no idea. Thought I was back home, but it was some - alternate universe. Had all the things I'd want. My home restored, Louis dead, the kingdom at relative peace... even someone I lost alive. But - Will wasn't.
[ his nose wrinkles a little as he tells this, affronted. ] That's what it was trying to tell me. If I felt like Will's death was worth all of that. It wasn't.